Funny wedding vows can lighten the mood of an otherwise
heavy occasion. Funny wedding vows can put the couple at ease along
with friends and family. Not everyone is comfortable expressing
the deep emotions of love, caring and permanence, so funny wedding
vows help for those who would like to go humorous rather than sentimental.
If you're one of these people who prefer humorous wedding vows
to those that are totally serious, we've assembled some samples
of funny wedding vows for inspiration.
Some of these funny wedding vows may be a bit over the top for
most ceremonies, but at least they may give you an idea of what
kind of humor you can put into your own personal vows.
Funny Wedding Vows
Will you Sam take Pam to be your wife? Will you love her, comfort
her and keep her warm on those long nights when her boyfriend is
gone? Will you remain true to her until Thursday afternoon and remain
together until she ticks you off for good?
Will you Bert have Ernestine to be your legally wedded wife? I
promise to be true to you in good times as long as you're healthy
and make love to me and make me dinner. Amen.
Ms. Seuss would you take this man to be your lawful wedded husband?
Would you could you in a house? Would you could you with this louse?
Would you could you in our church? Would you could you giving birth?
Would you take this Sam I Am man and in the morning feed him green
eggs and ham?
I, Luci take you Desi to be my husband, my partner in crime and
my one true bad boy lover. I will cherish our friendship even when
you're away in the Big House. I will love you today, tomorrow and
til the end of your life sentence. I will laugh at you, cry for
you and love you semi-faithfully through the best of appeals and
the worse of appeals. I've given you my hand to hold through jailhouse
glass and will visit you often. So, help me Judge Judy.
I, party of the first part, do thee wed, party of the second part,
to have and to hold under this contract witnessed before ye parties
of the third part. Heretowith, I proclaim myself without further
contractual obligations until such time as this marriage contract
becomes null and void in a court of law.
OMG, WTF my BFF is now my new husband!
I Barney, take you, Betty, to be my awful wedded wife, to have
and to scold, from this day fast forwarded for better but not worse,
for richer, sans poorer, forget sickness only in health, to loathe
and to cherish, til suspicious death do we part.
I, Salmonella offer myself to you in marriage, in accordance with
the Holy Scripture of Kazakhstan. I pledge honesty, sincerity and
once a month fidelity, depending upon my mood. I promise to be a
faithful and obedient wife as long as you don't cross me and I get
my way all the time. Salute!
These are only some samples of funny wedding vows that you may
wish to use on your wedding day or during the rehearsal for the
amusement of your fiancé or others. If your wedding is in
the South, perhaps you'd even like to check out our selection of
redneck wedding vows. Humorous
wedding vows help to lighten the mood, and when appropriate can
help individualize the ceremony for a lighthearted couple. Use them
at your discretion or better yet come up with your own. After all,
humor is in the eye of the beholder.